silent reverie

I got a haircut two days ago.  After several years of having long hair, I had a sudden impulse to just chop it off at shoulder length and deal with the consequences later.  The last time my hair was this short was in high school.  But here I am now, 22 years old, officially out of school, and facing a lot of things that are scarier than a bad haircut.  So I suppose the question I have to explore now is why - why I felt the need for a change, to do something not entirely new but something that I haven't done in a long time. I wondered if it was the whole "getting rid of the past and all its baggage" act but I don't think that's it.  I didn't go through some traumatic breakup and decide to chop off my hair in an act of feminist defiance  to social norms of beauty.  I haven't been through such a difficult time in the last few years that I have a need to symbolically shed my past.  I keep going back to the fact that I had short hair in high school a...

It always surprises me how the correction of the Holy Spirit can be at once a painful and frightening event as well as a refreshing dose of loving attention.  Tim Keller said that when employees screw up, they get fired, but when a child misbehaves, loving parents pay the child more attention.  And that's how it feels - I'm important enough that God would take the time to reveal the sins in my heart in order for me to gain more peace, more joy, and above all else, a relationship with Him that is less hindered by the blinds of my sinful nature. Ever since I accepted a job here in NY that would be at least a two year gig, I found myself with a renewed sense of purpose with Blueprint.  In my mind, I resolved to make the most effort on my part to make my church the growing, spiritually vibrant community of young believers I envisioned it to be.  And so I squared my shoulders and plunged myself into worship sets, small group meetings, powerpoint slides, PrimeTime practi...